This is just a quick post before bed tonight.
There are just some really beautiful people out there in the world. People who appreciate life, people who appreciate the little things, and people who you just know you are blessed to meet. Some are one and the same, who you just want to bundle up in a little ball and protect from the elements life throws at us.
But, who are we to stand in the way? If we had the capacity to truly protect people from all adversity how would we appreciate our gifts and blessings? How would we know what we are truly experiencing?
I have the most amazing job in the world. People are just beautiful, they have innocence, beauty, mannerisms and wonderfully unique personalities. Why else would we surround ourselves with only a handful? We need to be unique, and we need to have differing ways to be appreciated.
However life isn’t always this rosy shade of pink. Sometimes we have to be there for people in the hard times, we have to be stronger than they can be, and sometimes it’s ok to share emotions with them. In our own way we know how to be the support they need us to be.
This is how I look at my palliative patients. It’s not just about the patient, it’s also about their family and friends. Sure the patient is scared, or maybe prepared, but what about the loved ones? They truly suffer! After the patient has finished this leg of their journey who’s left to pick up the pieces? Not just the pieces left behind, but each individual has a life that now has a part of it that’s missing. And that is hard! It’s like coming home one day and finding only rubble where your house used to be. You don’t feel like it will ever be the same, or ever feel like home again. But you can sort through your belongings, and your memories and you can build a new structure. A structure decorated with those memories, and new memories. In a few months there could be a new house standing, not like the old one, but with new character. And, it never gets easier to rebuild that house, but those same friends and family will be there to help you sort through it all. And each time you add more memories and character to the new building.
I love my job because I support people and share in their fears, concerns and journeys. My direct actions can influence their experience, and sure I can come to work in a bad mood, and with a bad attitude just waiting to knock off, but what about them? They maybe facing horrible news, or be feeling confused and scared, their situation is fragile and it’s my job to support them and be an advocate. I’m on the front line, providing the care for the patient, someone’s loved one, not a number on a wall, a unique individual who means the world to other people. I’m also an advocate for the family, sometimes I’m their voice, and I’m often the tenderness and compassion from the doctor when they seem to miss the mark with their bedside manner.
Nurses have so much to learn, outside of the classroom. Something you can’t teach, either you have it or you don’t, you learn simply by doing.
I am so blessed to have the opportunity to be a part of these lives, and to hopefully make a difference and provide a positive experience amongst the heartache and sadness. It’s easy to provide the basic things, it’s harder to appreciate the little things, the things we don’t even notice ourselves that just make those last moments special.