My partner and I got engaged a few weeks ago! There it is, the news I seem to be sharing everyday lately, to people I haven’t seen since it happened, and to people I haven’t seen in a long time, and even to people who seem to notice my ring and comment on it. Let’s just say he did a good job choosing it.
So the next step is how to plan it. I’ve been married before and I don’t want the great grand white wedding this time, I want something smaller. I feel like I’ve grown and I want to learn from my past mistakes. I don’t want to have the big white frilly dress, but I would like a lovely one, a special one, one I wouldn’t wear again. I want the day to be special, it’s my partners first marriage and I want him to get out of it whatever he would like, a day we can share with our friends and family. He has simple needs, he just wants to get married and have a lovely honeymoon, he’s more focused on the honeymoon and doesn’t really seem to mind how we get there. A honeymoon will be a great chance for us to start our married life together, just us with no other stresses, no expectations just each others company. Something we really haven’t had for quite a long time.
Not long after we met we moved in together, at the end of the year he left his job to study full time while I supported us, now he’s still studying but he’s working casual. So we haven’t had the stress and carefree beginning you’d imagine, but we work well together, make a good team and I think we complement each other. He is laid back and needs someone to look after him, whereas I am the organiser and have spent my whole life looking after people. Don’t get me wrong, we have a very balanced existence; he helps me with the housework and has picked up quite a bit of slack since I’ve been doing so much overtime at work lately, and I try to be organised with meals and I organise our financial affairs. We all have strengths and weaknesses and I guess it’s about finding out what they are and working together.
So for our wedding day we’ve decided to have a ceremony somewhere nice, in a park, by the lake – somewhere inexpensive but lovely and that will take nice photos of the day. We plan to book out a restaurant where our guests (who have been fore-warned) will order and pay for their own dinner, after all we don’t need anything, we’ve lived together for over a year. We just want something simple, some simple decorations, an informal celebration to share, and at the end of it we just want some memories… Photos and maybe a few bits and pieces as a keepsake.
We live in a different time now, where people want to make their lives their own, they are stepping away from tradition. Although I like tradition, I think it’s important to do what you need to so as not to start a life filled with debt. My father can walk me down the isle, we can have a traditional dinner afterwards and do the honeymoon thing, but everything else is open to interpretation. Those who want to share with you will be there, what ever you choose to do, I don’t know why I doubted them. They are just happy to share it with you, to be considered.