Is it polite to ask for money at a wedding instead of gifts?
I have read varying responses on the internet on this topic. I have been married before, and we have everything we need, plus we live in a tiny house with no room for things we don’t need.
However, I am a little disappointed at the prospect of not having little things around the house for us to say “that was a wedding present”. We had a wishing well type system at our engagement party and we used that money for things to go towards the wedding, but we did get one gift voucher for a kitchen store, which was great for me because there is always something I can get from there. When I look at it, that’s what I think about now. I would like us to have some things around the house that are a result of the life we’re creating together. That might sound old-fashioned but I guess I am a little. I like some old-fashioned traditions, and somethings I think would be a shame to lose.
So in the meantime I guess I’m going to write a wishing well poem, and in a tactful way emphasise the fact we don’t need gifts, but that we will have a wishing well available for anyone who still feels the need to contribute to our new lives together. But I think with it we will purchase things we can look back at and know that’s what we got as a wedding gift. I guess other than getting a gift registry for things we do actually need, this is the next best option. It’s only a backyard type wedding, and I’m not longer wearing a traditional dress, but hey, we might as well write our own rules. We’re having only 50 guests, and a lot of those people are doing favours for us in place of gifts, and I’m much happier with that. I guess it’s like they are being more involved in making the day special for us.
It’s been really lovely to see how much people have been offering to do for us. I didn’t realise what great friends we had, and how much they care about us until we announced our engagement. I guess I never ask for help, and this is the first time I’ve actually accepted it, other than the extra hands when we moved house.